the truth is – almost relationships can hurt just as much as real relationships because connection isn’t measured in time. When your heart connects with someone, it connects with someone. Sometimes, that depth is fostered over years. And sometimes you crash into another human being and despite only knowing them for a short collection of moments, you know that they are going to mean something to you. You know that you are going to care. There are no rules. But, the hardest lesson you will ever have to learn, is that – you won’t always end up with those you feel something deep and meaningful with. Some chapters of our lives are full and concrete closure. But some chapters end quickly, sometimes in the middle of the page, sometimes even before we are ready. What we don’t often realize is that : that’s closure too…because it’s still an ending.
So when you are holding all of this hurt within you, when you are gripping at all of the ways you could have loved someone beautifully and fully with every inch of your human heart if you have just been given the chance – remember that you want to be loved and chosen too. Not almost loved or almost chosen. If someone can’t do that, you deserve to discover someone who can. Because the right person will be consistent. The right person will put forth the appropriate amount of effort. The right person will make everything feel easy, natural. Almosts aren’t natural. You have all of this hope, and all of these feelings… and you’re trying to give it to someone who doesn’t want to hold it. You’re trying to convince someone that you’re worthy of being chosen. But the right person will choose you. You deserve someone who wants the same things, someone who wants to meet all of your hope with action.
Until the universe decides to bring that someone into your life, you have to let go of your “almost something”.
If you don’t let go of the wrong people, the right people won’t show up.
Personal note: Time doesn’t mean shit when it comes to affairs of the heart. Getting over my 10 year relationship took me low-key 3 months. Getting over my “almost something” took me high-key an entire year. So give yourself time…as corny as this might sound: time is a real healer.
Go no contact and cut that person completely off. Going back and forth won’t change things…trust me, been there.. done that… it makes everything worse and it will leave you both with a bitter aftertaste and maybe even hard feelings and resentment . Just let go of it naturally, be grateful for the connection you’ve experienced,even if it was just for a brief amount of time… cuz a real connection is a fucking rare thing (at least for me haha) , try to let go of all the grudges and enjoy this amazing life on your own until you’re fully ready for someone new.If you don’t take the time to heal , you might hurt the next person that comes along and has only pure intentions . (also been there, done that – I call it : the circle of shit)
Don’t rush into a new thing just to forget about someone, it’s unfair and cruel. Rebound is not the answer to a broken heart, you can’t just put a band-aid over your broken pieces , it doesn’t work like that, it will just cause more damage,not only to you.. but to all the parties involved.
A rebound isn’t the answer. The solution to a broken heart isn’t finding somebody else to seal the wound,but falling in love with your solitary self. It is relearning how to enjoy the quiet joy of your own company and trust again in your capability to navigate life on your own.